Early and tedious school mornings; long, long, long English lessons, or the restless wait for school day to end are often quite relatable experiences in this rather vast student community. But as I was trying to look for another integral link that unifies us in this bond called “student hood” I realize that for many a rather absurd source of pressure is a shared essence. Because in this hallowed hall of academia, where the pursuit of knowledge reigns supreme, a subtle yet powerful force often takes hold: the quest for “Academic Validation”.
What is Academic Validation?
Not all of us share this his craving for recognition and approval we now know as academic validation, however, many may be directly or indirectly affected by this rather absurd desire.
This feeling can lead many to achieve unbelievable goals, pushing boundaries and challenging one’s self, however, this method of measuring one’s self-worth is undoubtedly damaging.
Academic validation is more than just the satisfaction of a job well done; it’s the gold star that many chase, seeking affirmation from peers, professors, and the academic community at large. It means you are (or at least you think) only as good as your last test score, your last award or the last words someone uttered affirming your self-worth.
My Experience With Academic Validation
And for the longest time ever, academic validation shaped my academic journey, relationship with people around me and ultimately having a major toll on my mental health.
For context, in 2019 I, along with my parents migrated to England and almost immediately had join a high school, in a country with no contacts or friends. According to my little brain, being smart was the only way I was going to standout or make friends. Thus started the journey of me making school and books my entire personality. I was a literal book worm through year 7 and 8, sitting on my study table for hours on end, only leaving it to get food that too to eat on my table.
Crazy! I know.
But… it gets worse
I remember, in year 8 crying over my Maths test just because I got the second highest score. Embarrassing as it sounds now, I bawled my eyes out in the dark as I thought I had disappointed my teacher, even though I can guarantee he couldn’t care less about a year 8 student giving her second test in midst of a pandemic.
Why is Academic Validation Problematic?
Now that I look back at it in hindsight, I believe it’s not the score alone that’s the problem but the personal standards we have and the unrealistic goals we put in place for ourselves.
Personal standards can exacerbate the impact of academic validation in several ways:
- It Heightens the Pressure and Stress: Individuals set exceptionally high personal standards and often feel immense pressure to meet or exceed the end goal. It adds unnecessary academic stress
- Gives birth to Perfectionists: It instills the idea that only flawless performance is acceptable. It creates a scenario where anything less than perfection is seen as a failure.
- Increases the Risk of Imposter Syndrome: High personal standards often lead the students to constantly doubt their abilities and in many cases such as mine, makes you feel like a fraud.
- Leads to Comparison and Competition: Individuals tend to foster a competitive environment. Academic validation becomes a zero-sum game, where someone else’s success feels like a personal failure. This competitive outlook can harm relationships and create a toxic academic atmosphere.
- Instills the Fear of Failure: It causes the students to avoid opportunities where success is not guaranteed which limits the academic or personal goal. After all the best way of learning is to fail.
The Causes of Academic Validation
And before I jump to the point where this turns into a “How to” post exploring different ways to deal with academic validation I’d like to touch on what, in my opinion may be the cause of this desire of validating yourself.
I’d place the societal expectations and education system at the top of the list, followed by psychological security and external recognition.
Let’s look at them individually and whilst we are at that, I think we should also make some links in between:
Lack of individualized attention where a teacher may fail to recognise the vast array of talents can lead a student into thinking that only certain types of achievements are valuable. Plus, the overemphasis on STEM subjects can marginalize other areas of interest and talents.
This mindset that is instilled at a really young age eventually shapes a society, comprising of parents, friends and relatives that come to hyper fixate on grades, reinforcing the idea that academic success is paramount.
The need to gain praise from teacher, peers and family eventually becomes a source of dopamine because the external recognition can be highly motivational and fulfilling especially when one’s emotional value is attached to the person giving the praise.
The constant admiration in an individual’s life can create a structured path to success and reduce anxiety about the future, but it creates a bubble that we may never leave, the bubble of comfort zone that becomes too high risk to expand out of.
Anyways, that is what I think at least.
How to Not Seek Academic Validation
And thus, we move on the “how to” segment of the blog where I tell you how I think we might be able to overcome this craving.
So,
Solution #1
Find good friends.
This is crucial, absolutely crucial. Find friends that make you feel worth it regardless of your academic or social status. If they make you forget about your worries and you are comfortable being yourself around them, you, my friend, have hit the JACKPOT.
Or at least that is how I felt.
I say this because, from year 7 up till year 9, I was constantly hyper-fixated on getting good grades to a point where I was only approached, texted or called to confirm answers to certain questions and me being a people pleaser would also often trade answers and words for friendship. This as you may realize was hell a lot of pressure. I don’t blame anyone, I made grades my entire personality, and that’s on me that people got that impression.
Anyways, year 10 comes along and thankfully I found a group of great friends; I truly felt relieved because, I could talk to them or completely sit in silence comfortably without thinking that I am only worth it to be friends with because of my brain power.
Also, it is not to say you can’t have competition with your friends, and you should lower your standards, it is to say that you should keep a balance.
Don’t make acquaintances based on what you can trade. Make friends who are with you regardless of how useful you are (but don’t entirely be useless 😉).
Solution # 2
Learn different skills.
Don’t limit yourself to theoretical knowledge. Find yourself practical skills that would be a great conversation starter. Find good work experience, learn expertise that would equally make you realize you are capable of a lot more than blurting words on sheet of paper.
For example, I started work experience and although I was meant to be tutoring people, I was also busy putting up wallpaper, making furniture, screwing and hammering stuff down.
Girl Boss in making, you see!
Okay sorry, I got carried away, anyways that is to say, that when you have great skills up your sleeves, pressure of getting good grades may settle down a little because then grades aren’t the only things you can control or use to prove your self-worth.
Solution # 3
And, when friendship was out of bounds and I had no time to learn skills, I oftened turned to Youtubers like UnJaded Jade and Lana Blakely for a little comfort.
Thus bringing me to my third point, take care of your wellbeing.
Knowing that you are trying your best and that a healthy relationship with academics is a lot more valuable than the shortlived grade value.
It is always important to create the work life and personal life balance even if it means that you are a student for now. That stress that has almost paralyzed you right this moment won’t even matter in 2 years time when you’ll have another problem awaitng.
So save yourself the trouble for now.
And relax a little- because we are still figuring it out. Having that perfect grade may seem the solution for now but in the grand scheme of works, there is a lot more that deserve your precious breathes.
It’s easier said than done of-course, but we all eventually learn to deal with it or live with it, but I know there is a way out of it and that we as students are much more than grades.
Please feel free to add your thoughts in the comment section below! 😊
Raniya Abrar